Buying a house in Grand Rapids is stressful. It starts with the looong search for the perfect house. Then, you have the back and forth of price negotiations. You have inspections and water reports. The mortgage company asks for about 1,000 documents. Everyone needs to coordinate with the title company. Etcetera, etcetera.
Does it ever end? How did such a simple process (buying and selling something) get so crazy?
Fortunately, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Once everything clears, you will have a great new place to call your own. However, how do you deal with stress DURING the closing process?
1. Remember that the stress is temporary.
Through many cultures, wise teachers have passed on this pearl of advice: “This too, shall pass.”
While the closing period seems eternal, remember that in the grand scheme of things, this intense, detailed process will be over soon. This tip alone can keep you sane as you search for old W-2s from three years ago.
Prepare yourself to ‘hurry up and wait.’ One week, you may have to coordinate inspections, talk to 12 people about land boundaries, and rush to sign 9 documents for your mortgage company. The next, you might get one email from your Grand Rapids Realtor telling you that ‘things are coming along.’ This is normal, and expected. It can be jarring though!
2. Control what you can, let go of what you can’t.
During the closing process, many things are in your control. You choose the house, the offer price, and your contingencies. You can decide if the inspection is acceptable, shop around for mortgage rates, and negotiate closing costs.
However, it is impossible to control everything. You don’t decide your appraisal amount. You can’t determine whether the seller will accept, counter, or decline your offer. You can’t speed up the mortgage company (much), and you can’t control last minute title-issues that threaten the purchase.
So, work hard on the things you can influence. Follow up during your due diligence period, and do your homework with regards to your financing. But don’t stress about the things you can’t control.
While this process is very emotional, remember that other houses exist. If, in the worst case scenario, you can’t purchase the home, there will be another. Let go of the uncontrollable, and you will sleep much better at night.
3. Don’t get too ahead of yourself.
Many people start picking out furniture as soon as they make an offer. They envision the wall colors, the baby room, and how they’re going to redo the kitchen. While this is fun and enjoyable, tread carefully.
Until the house is yours, you don’t want to be 100% emotionally invested in it. Often, the inspection process will reveal flaws in the house. There may be challenges to the property lines, or an old lien that everyone forgot about.
First, you need to be able to walk away if the house is not right for you. If you’re ‘all-in’ emotionally, this is much harder to do.
Secondly, if the house doesn’t work, and you’ve already committed yourself to living there, it can be extremely disappointing. If you keep some emotional distance between yourself and the home, this is much easier.
So go ahead and think about the neat things you’re imagining for the place. But temper your enthusiasm, and don’t count your chickens before they hatch!
4. Don’t do ‘house stuff’ right before bed.
If it’s 9:30 PM, and you normally go to bed at 10:30, don’t start working things for your potential new house (unless you have no other options).
Buying a house is a long process, with many steps. Even after you close, you need to coordinate logistics for the move, your furniture, paint colors, and more. If you start working on them, your brain will start spinning, and it can be difficult to fall asleep.
Do what you can in the evening, but relax a bit before bed. In almost every case, tasks can wait until the morning.
So take a deep breath, tackle things one at a time, and you’ll be fine. Good luck!